One Diversion

I don't know how your weekend has been, but this is how mine started out yesterday:




                                                   

Know who these guys are?  Trust me, if you don't already, you will.  If there are any teens or tweens in your life, you are up to *here* with One Direction, or as the hip and trendy on this planet abbreviate it, 1D.  My eleven-year-old, Sydney, has been enamored with these little Brit-Shits since last year.  I can't pass a box of Pop-Tarts, a canister of Pringles, or a bottle of Dawn dishsoap in the store without seeing the mop-haired five staring back at me.

All of this in-your-face promotion has been leading up to one thing:  The much anticipated release of "One Direction---This is Us" this past week.  This is literally all I have been hearing about since February.  That, and "Mom!  Don't you think One Direction is the greatest band ever?" Um...no "Mom! Which one do you think is hot?! Isn't Harry hot?! I think Liam is an idiot, but Harry is HOT!" Well, to be honest, Sydney, I have a hard time finding anything "hot" about a nineteen-year-old whose voice is probably still changing and who appears to weigh about 101 pounds.  "Mom!!! All I want for my birthday is One Direction stuff--that's ALL!"

And all I want, my darling daughter,  is for you to come out of this little phase and realize that by this time next year, all of the One Direction stuff you want and are filling your room with will be put in bags for Goodwill, because you will outgrow them and be on to something else, and you won't want it cluttering your space.

Try and fight it.

I remember in the mid-seventies, THIS was who I was besotted with:










Oh, shut up.

I suppose if it was a picture of Shaun Cassidy or Donny Osmond there wouldn't be a problem, would there? See the similarities?  Five scrawny, British (okay, they were Scottish) guys who, like One Direction, realized meteoric fame almost overnight. I bought every Tiger Beat, 16, and Teen Beat magazine faithfully and plastered their stupid little mugs all over my room.  Clothes shopping for me had to have been a nightmare for my poor mother--all I wanted was plaid.  I hated plaid, but I was their number-one fan, so I wore it.  To be honest, that was really all of the adoration that I could afford back then.  There was no facebook, no Twitter to track their whereabouts, no YouTube or cable television to entertain myself with the Bay City Rollers all day.  No there wasn't.  But, what there was was a turntable and 33 1/3 LP's that I played.  Non-stop.

Wait--back it up; did I say "meteoric fame?" Pfffft!

Did you know that the Bay City Rollers were being touted as the next Beatles?!  How stupid a claim was that, but remember, this was 1976, and as you know, the Beatles had been disbanded for a few years by that time and people were hungry for a replacement, and this my friends, THIS, was the replacement. Sounds rather rick-frickin-diculous even typing those words right now, but in 1976, to my lovesick, fourteen-year-old heart, this was some serious shit.

So, I do have something in common with my daughter after all.  We both are/were rabid fans of popular boy bands.  I will have to concede, though, that the boys in One Direction seem to have a little more going for them in the looks department, and dare I say talent?  So it kind of made me think:  Where will One Direction be in 40 years? Well, if history is any indication, that can go a couple of different ways.  Lets look at the Beatles and the Rolling Stones for the sake of argument, shall we? The Rolling Stones, bless their hearts, still tour.  The Beatles, although two have left us (may John and George rest in peace), remain successful solo artists.  Paul can still sell out an arena, and Ringo....um,...yeah.

Now, how about those "Next Beatles"?  Remember,The Bay City Rollers?  I happened to take the liberty and do a little investigating on my own, so I will mercifully spare you the unpleasant details.  If you're really that interested, look it up yourself, but be forewarned:  It's pre-tttty bad. And that's just their personal lives and the trouble some of them have been in since plummeting to earth after their meteoric rise to fame that lasted, oh, all of about EIGHTEEN MONTHS.

So, off we went to the 11:30 am showing yesterday.  I was expecting a crush of tweenyboppers carrying posters and placards, but the parking lot and the movie theater were suspiciously silent.  That's probably because all of the good Moms insisted on taking their families to church on Sunday morning, instead of hitting the cinema.  We got our tickets, (which by the way, at ten dollars a pop were a bit pricey, but to be fair, we did get some kick-ass 3D glasses) we settled in with our smuggled in snacks in a theater that had only two other little girls sitting in the top row.  We were there for about five minutes when the shadowy figures above started chanting "Sydney!  SYDNEY!!!"  It seems the kid can't go anywhere without being recognized, so I was being systematically blown off by my own daughter, since she apparently preferred their company to mine.   Now I was sentenced to what I thought would amount to a nice nap in a noisy dark place, but at least I wouldn't incur Sydney's wrath for doing so as she had better things to do than sit with her Ma.

You know what?  I know, I'm just as surprised about this as you will be---I didn't sleep at all.  I couldn't keep my eyes from this movie.  If you didn't know, there is actually a pretty interesting story about how One Direction came to be and their meteoric rise to fame.  I had no idea Simon Cowell was involved, but I will say I have gained a little respect for the man and how he stuck with these kids.  Throughout the movie/documentary/whatever you want to call it, I was pulled in by these kids' personalities, tenacity, and overall, well.......decency.  I was surprised, and I have to say, there are a lot worse musicians or acts that my little girl could be in the throes of lunacy over.

And yes, Sydney, I must concur.....Harry IS hot :)